FOTC, Friend or Foe?

Today's blog is about the importance of staying married. And not for the reasons you are probably thinking (vows, God, children, love, etc.)... If you get married you should stay that way and not get divorced, because when you get a divorce you are forced to deal with the people at the Friend of the Court. These people are awful, I am sure there may be 5 people there that are nice, and know what the hell they are doing... But I have never spoken to any of these 5 people, so for now, everyone there sucks! When my ex husband and I decided to get a divorce we said that we didn't want any child support from one another. We both would pay for things for Olivia when we had her. She would stay on his insurance because well, simply put, it's FAR better than mine. And if he needed money towards any medical bills or anything of that nature, I'd pitch in. This was genius, so we thought. We had no idea there would be so much paperwork just to "opt out" of the court system. Now, paperwork is not my complaint, I understand there is paperwork and time spent on everything. That's just how the world works, it's filled with papers and time consuming phone calls and meetings. My complaint is that we've been divorced now "officially" for almost 4 years and I am still having to call the Friend of the Court because they have messed so many things up. First, they had my daughters last name wrong and her birthday in 2001. I was in high school in 2001, I didn't have a baby. She wasn't born until 2003, and her last name has always been Mikan, way to go Friend of the Court. So after my ex and I both called several times and filled out new paperwork for it, it took them 3 years to get her name right. Next complaint, they have been taking money out of my paycheck, over half of my money by the way, and before that, my entire check. This was supposed to be for child support, I know what you're thinking, "but didn't you say that you opted out, and weren't paying support", yup! They just decided for what ever reason, they would take money from me. The money isn't even going to my ex, either. We have no clue where this money is going, and they haven't told me, either. Every time I call them, they claim that this is taken care of and that my balance is $0. Unfortunately, this is not true, because we are going on month 5 of me having my checks cut in half. The Friend of the Court is now telling me that money is going towards "child care". My daughter doesn't get child care, she's almost 7 years old and goes to public school, all day long. When she's home from school, she's with me, my ex, or our families. So who am I paying this "child care" to, and what for? Have I mentioned that every SINGLE time I call my caseworker to address the situation, she doesn't answer her phone. I leave her several messages a day and I get no returned phone calls. Recently, I was able to talk to someone higher up and they told me that they would be sending me paperwork to fill out (oh joy) to get this fixed. It took over a week for me to get that "paperwork", and when it got here, it was wrong. Or at least it looks wrong. So here I am again, calling and calling, in an attempt to get this stuff fixed. You know, this would've been so much easier if the person who first took our case did their job correctly! In conclusion, if you get married and decide to have children, don't get divorced!

Tomorrow's blog--Customers at my restaurant!

Just tell 'em large Marge sent ya!

I am going to start this off by saying, I mean no offense to larger women out there. I apologize in advance if you think that what I am saying is directed towards you in any way. Sorry. Okay, I don't understand the "larger" women who choose to wear clothing that is 4 sizes too small. Do you look in the mirror and honestly say to yourself "Damn, I look good. Think I'll go out in public."?

At a recent trip to the grocery store to pick up a prescription, I was in line behind a very large lady. She was wearing those sweatpants that are supposed to look like jeans, and a top that was probably a size medium (she wasn't anywhere close to a medium sized lady). I'm assuming she was there to pick up her meds for diabetes and high blood pressure (again, just assuming).

Her purple bra strap was hanging out under her tight shirt, I'm sure just so that it could breathe, and her rolls... Well, lets just say, if someone asked her to "pass the rolls", she'd have plenty to spare. My question is, who is telling this woman that she looks good? Where are her honest girl friends to let her know that what she's doing/wearing isn't sexy?

If she doesn't have these friends, I feel very bad for her. I think that every woman needs an honest girl friend or gay guy friend to let them know when they are having a fashion mishap! Am I wrong? Maybe that's just the thing, maybe this woman asked her friends if she is wrong for dressing this way, and then made the lame joke, "If I'm wrong, I don't wanna be right!". I don't think that people use that saying anymore, but then again, I didn't think that people who owned mirrors and were a clear size 25, wore size 4 clothing. I applaud women who embrace their "curvy" figures, or "womanly" shapes. But being disgustingly obese is another story. You are killing yourself, and that's not sexy.

I feel the same way about the women who are too thin and are killing themselves by not eating. This whole "big woman" movement is getting a bit out of hand, don't you think? I mean, do you honestly think that you are going to be the next "Precious"? Come on, that girl isn't even the next anything... She has an Oscar and will most likely be having a heart attack before the age of 35. Is this what we want as our role model? Congrats on the Academy Award, but you won't be able to enjoy it if you continue to consume your own weight in chicken wings! Alright, that was my rant for the day. Love your curves women, but everyone else doesn't need to love them too. Tuck them under a nice fitting top.

P.S. The sweats that look like jeans... Everyone knows you are wearing sweats, you aren't fooling us.

Ordering pizza and getting what you ordered...

I was unaware of how difficult it was to order pizza and have them deliver what you ordered... I recently (35 mins ago) placed an order at a pizza place (they are known for their flavored crust), for a medium pepperoni pizza with 3x ranch crust. Yes, I like ranch. They charged me over $3 for delivery, which was fine because I didn't feel like leaving the apartment in the rain, and when the pizza arrived it had NO ranch crust. None! Not 1x ranch, not 2x, and certainly not 3x... NONE! Needless to say, this makes me very upset, as we established, I love my ranch. So I call the pizza place (rhymes with Gungry Gowies) and the lady says, " I can send the delivery guy back out with a new pizza and you can give him back the one we gave you"... I then inform her that I am on my way out the door, and I don't have time to wait for a pizza guy to come and "trade" pizzas with me! So she suggests that I "bring the pizza back and get a new one." Hey lady, if I wanted to pick up the pizza I would have done that in the first place and not paid over $3 for delivery! Also, it's not like their pizza is spectacular, I get it for the flavored crust! If I wanted a pizza without flavored crust I would have gotten it from some other establishment. So now I have a "code" that I can call in to get a free pizza, with flavored crust. Thanks a lot!

Today in the world of celebs in bikini's...

Let's get started. Today's disappointment is the website wwtdd.com. I will preface this by saying, I go to this website on a daily basis, and I usually enjoy what I read. However, I am really getting tired of the "celebrities" in their bikini's, bras, topless, etc. Come on now, how much of this do we really need? Even the majority of male visitors to this site have got to be getting sick of "check out this skinny chick with HUGE boobs". If you are not familiar with this site let me tell you a bit about it... It's named for the Fight Club character Tyler Durden (clever) and consists of rumors and criticism by it's writer Brendon. There used to be various funny and clever thoughts on celebrity news and the occasional "boob" pic stuck in between. It seems that in the last couple of months it's the other way around completely. I'm sure that Mr.Brendon is aware that the majority of his readers are 17-25 yr old females, right? So what do women want to read about, not boobs for sure. As a women, possibly in that age range, I can tell you I enjoy the occasional nipple slip as much as the next guy... But I don't need a life filled with nipple slips and giant implants! Brendon is funny and entertaining, though he has a fascination with larger breasts on tiny bodies, I don't fault him for that (aka: being the typical male). I would just really enjoy going back to "some" pictures of bikinis and more hilarious jokes about current pop culture. So in conclusion, wwtdd.com not a bad site, worth a visit. If you're a girl who really enjoys it, Brendon loves getting pictures of your tits with wwtdd written on them!